The Explosion

Today is a day that will live in infamy. At approximately 12:30pm, Tyler Christopher Kolchuk had "The Explosion".

Are you already guessing what happened? Are you questioning whether you should be eating something while reading this?

You should be.

Daddy was drying Tyler's behind off after a diaper change, gently lifting him by his legs, when Tyler suddenly calmed down and got very quiet. Normally this precedes a poop or a pee, but nothing like what happened today. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the poop flew out so fast that it left no mark on his behind as it came out. It hit Daddy in the hand, splattered the changing pad, soiled Tyler's outfit, and even got clothes inside his dresser soiled! Yes, Tyler's poop dripped from the changing pad, onto the dresser and dropped into the slightly opened dresser drawer, where unprotected clothes were waiting to be hit.

Now, have I ruined any appetite you may have had?

Daddy froze for a moment as he realized the extent of the damage. Tyler had struck the changing pad, his onesy, three, yes three, washcloths, his old and new diaper, the blanket under the changing pad, the dresser, and a cute outfit in the 2nd dresser drawer. I raced to get the paper towels and stop anything else from being soiled, the whole time muttering to myself, "ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod."

You see, Kelly was taking a shower, and Daddy could only wonder what Mommy would think when she saw what had happened.

When she did: She laughed hysterically, almost not breathing. Yes, at my expense, Tyler and Mommy had quite a hoot.

I spent the next 30 minutes cleaning things up while Kelly attended to Tyler's sudden desire to eat. Huh, strange. I wonder why he'd be hungry. Could it be that the entire contents of his belly had been expelled in The Explosion? Hmmmmm.

And there you have it. The account of The Explosion. A day that Daddy will never forget.

Ever.

LOL.

...and you thought you'd read one of my more sappy posts today, huh?